I am an oxymoron. OK… MAYBE I’M JUST A MORON. I apparently suffer from G.S. and I also suffer from a lack of G.S. I guess I should explain what that means. I suffer from Good Samaritanism. Yes, that is totally a word because I just made it up.
The symptoms of Good Samaritanism are that you have an overwhelming desire to help less fortunate creatures than yourself both human and critter variety. It makes you want to help them out in any way you possibly can to facilitate their health and well being and even though that makes you feel really good and gives you the warm fuzzies it can also lead to the second problem…. Lack of G.S. (Good Sense in this case) which can sometimes cause you to do really stupid things and end up in the hospital. You know those famous last words… “Hey Ya’ll, watch THIS!”
No, seriously…. As I type this I am laying in a hospital bed hooked up to IV’s because of a lack of good sense. Actually hubby and I had a discussion about this very topic as he was driving me to the hospital! I told him that I have lots of common sense, just not always good sense and today I think I lost both of them for a bit. It’s a really bad combination, trust me!
Here’s what happened…for the last several months I have been seeing this black kitty hanging around the periphery of our yard. He will sit at the edge of the yard and cry. He looked puny and is obviously homeless so every time I’d see him lurking around I’d take food out because he looked hungry. He also is obviously blind in one eye so I felt really sorry for him. I mean it’s bad enough that he’s homeless but even worse that he’s homeless and handicapped!
This week he started getting bolder & actually coming in the yard so I made the mistake of feeding him on the patio. Three of the last four nights he has actually come to the back door and scratched and cried so I took him food out. Last night he didn’t show up so I thought maybe he moved on. This morning I was asleep when hubby woke me up and said “That black cat is at the back door again. I almost let him in when I took Chorizo out so you might want to get up and feed him.” Yes, I am TOTALLY throwing hubby under the bus here!
I got up and threw on my robe and shoes and grabbed a cup of cat food and headed outside to the patio. He was sitting there peeking in the back door crying and I went out and put the food on a plastic dish and actually poured half of it on the patio because he rubbed against my hand and knocked it out of the cup! I sat in a chair right beside where I put his food and he purred and rubbed against my leg and my hand so I sat there and petted his head while he was eating and he just purred his little heart out.
We’re sitting there with him eating & purring & me rubbing his head when Lala popped around the corner of the house. Now Lala is a very petite little kitty and she was only wanting to go back in the house. She wasn’t threatening him in any way. Apparently he either thought she was after his food which he wasn’t willing to give up or he thought I was going to quit petting him and turn my attention to her. Whatever he thought, it wasn’t good because he bolted after her hissing and growling and in the interest of protecting Lala I instinctively grabbed him because he was much closer to me than she was and I knew he’d reach her way before I could and he was much bigger than her.
BAD mistake. In hindsight, it was my own fault. Yes, mark this date on the calendar because I am taking full responsibility. Two times you should never mess with any cat… especially a feral cat, is when they are either eating or when they are fixing to get into a smack down with another cat. Yes, that was a bad mistake. He latched onto my arm and I practically had to pry his teeth out of my arm. Not a scratch but a deep puncture. I ran in the house dripping blood down my arm and poured it down with peroxide and colloidal silver.
I got it to stop bleeding long enough to get several bandaids on it. Then I took my shower and told hubby we should try to catch it to take it to the animal shelter for observation to make sure it didn’t have rabies or something. I told him since the cat was no longer hungry he’d probably only entice it with canned food. He tried to entice him but the cat obviously didn’t trust him so after I got dressed I went back out and got him halfway in the cage and he freaked again and scratched me this time. I said F** that … I gave up.
Hubby told me to go to the doctor to get a tetanus shot since I hadn’t had one in about 10 years. I had lots of errands to run and decided to go by the “Minute Clinic” at the local Walgreens to see if I could get a tetanus shot since I didn’t have an appointment at the doctor and it sometimes takes a few days to get on the books. I went in and asked if they could do a tetanus shot because I’d gotten bitten by a stray cat and the nurse practitioner comes out and looks at it and says sure and I tell her why I came there instead of my doctor and she gives me the shot and then says “Ummmm… you really need to go see your doctor …. NOW. You’re gonna need some antibiotics.” Well, heck, why didn’t you tell me that BEFORE you gave me the tetanus shot because now I have to pay TWO co-pays!
So I brace myself for the hours long wait IF they can see me. I go to the doc’s office to see if they can fit me in and at first the receptionist tells me they are double booked and can’t see me but then she says she’ll “fit me in” so I settle down for a long wait. It actually took less time than I thought. It got back in the office in about an hour which considering they worked me in was a miracle. The doctor comes in and checks out my arm and after talking a few minutes he says “I’m gonna send you over to the hospital because you need IV antibiotics.” I am allergic to the first three on the list for this situation so he said since they were going to have to use #4 I’d need the IV. So I’m thinking outpatient stuff and then he tells me he’s writing orders to admit me to the hospital for IV’s and “observation”. I’m like “Yeah, right!” thinking he’s totally kidding and he goes “No… you could DIE!” Well, gee, thanks for sugar coating that for me doc. So, he sends me off to the hospital and here I sit… or rather lie.
I had to go down last night for
chest xrays and I happen to know one of the technicians so as we were chatting and I told her “So…. I guess “Cat Scratch Fever” is a real thing and not just a song by Ted Nugent! And if you hear some shuffling around up on the second floor then I guess “Stray Cat Strut” must be real too!” At least I haven’t lost my sense of humor, right?
And to make sure we take care of everything while I’m in here they have decided to give me a few vaccines to make sure I don’t get the “Rockin’ Pneumonia” or the “Boogey Woogey Flu”! And while we’re at it… maybe I should follow my mom’s advice and get my “heenie” shot (H1N1)! Ya’ll take care now… ya hear?