Excuse Me, But…

An Open Letter to the Fairly Young Lady I Saw Today: 

W T F?????

 

Dear Ms. Fluorescent Yellow Outfit Wearer: 

Where do I even start?  First of all, it is still winter, we still have another month of it left. Remember that’s what Punxsutawney Phil said?  Six more weeks (minus the two that have transpired) of winter so it is still WAY too cold to be wearing that today! I know General Beauregard Lee was predicting a short winter, but CNN contends that he has been wrong roughly 70% of the time.  It’s not Spring yet! 

Groundhog Day

 

Secondly, you are NOT a teenager.  You may still be fairly young, but you ain’t no Miley Cyrus or Taylor Swift!  Dress your age dear. 

Miley, Did you see bumblebee lady too?

 

I think Taylor is giving her the evil eye too!

 

Thirdly, your outfit WAS SO fluorescent lemon yellow that even though I was thoroughly engrossed in reading my book I STILL saw you coming out of the corner of my eye.  Nay, I think I FELT you coming around the corner.  It’s pretty bad when your outfit shines brighter than the sun.  What’s wrong?  Didn’t Mommy and Daddy pay enough attention to you when you were younger?  Or do you just feel compelled to be the center of attention?  Maybe you thought you were the center of the universe and the planets were orbiting around you? 

Fourthly, I think that outfit was meant for someone about 2 or 3 (maybe even 4) sizes smaller than you.  At first glance I just thought you were maybe extremely jaundiced and had forgotten to get dressed altogether.  Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with a woman of size wearing eye catching clothing IF it is the proper size that they are supposed to wear.  It’s not that I think you are BIG…. It’s just the outfit was so small.   I’m pretty sure that the top was supposed to wear like a dress or oversized blouse, not a leotard.  

Fifthly, that belt…. Was THAT really necessary?  You don’t think a W I D E   S T R E T C H belt with a neon yellow outfit that looks like you were greased and poured into wasn’t  just a teensy  bit of overkill? And don’t even get me started on that jacket that didn’t even come down as far as the belt… 

Sixthly (is that a word?), WHITE CREW SOCKS?  SERIOUSLY???? Nuff said on that. 

Lastly, the furry bedroom slippers?  I’m pretty sure you were NOT in your bedroom or even in your home.  Did you not realize you were in PUBLIC?  And outside?  Did you not even LOOK in the mirror before you left your house? Were you TRYING for shock and awe?  Or maybe you just thought we all needed a good laugh? 

I only regret that at first sighting  I was rendered SO speechless (yeah, I know, me?) and I was so taken aback that I could not whip out my camera phone fast enough to get you in all your frontal glory! 

Oh, yeah… and it’s not nice to dig in your butt in public! 

Very truly yours, 

The UN-fashion police 

P.S.  The black baseball cap really completed the ensemble.  May I borrow it tomorrow? 

P.P.S.  If you were trying to show your support for Georgia Tech or just Bumblebees in general?  I’m sorry, no, really I’m just sorry.

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About pegbur7

South of the Mason/Dixon Line
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

20 Responses to Excuse Me, But…

  1. gregjohn says:

    Wow. You let her have it. No reference to a banana or canary or bottle of mustard? Rolling on the yellow line on a highway. Subbing for a traffic light. Can’t say where the sun don’t shine. A daisy a day. Mellow yellow.

  2. gregjohn says:

    Hi, Peg.
    Here’s a good one for you.
    I emailed you the following instructions in three emails and I sent a couple other remarks also.

    ALL TO : “pegbur7”

    And, I’m wondering why you haven’t done it or responded. I mean how rude of you. [no, I would never think you rude]

    Here are instructions for putting the award on your sidebar.

    open your blog

    and then

    open my blog in another window or tab.

    In your blog, go to your Dashboard.
    Click on Appearance
    Click on Widgets.
    Scroll down to the Image widget.
    Drag it over and up to the sidebar.

    it will open up to something that may scare you, but calm down and take a breath.

    Go to my blog.
    click on the title of the post. this will change the URL at the top of the screen.

    Right click on the award itself.
    At the bottom it says, Properties.
    left click on that.
    You will get a little box.
    Just below halfway down, you will see Location on the left.
    to the right of that is a long URL starting with http://
    You want to highlight that.
    Put your cursor to the left of it, hold down the left button and drag it across — all the way across — even past what you can initially see.
    Until you come to .jpg
    When it’s highlighted, right click
    and left click on copy.

    go back to your blog.
    paste what you copied on the second space in the widget box. where it says Image URL.
    Type Beautiful Blogger in the top space.

    You can type in a caption if you want, maybe who you got it from…..

    go back to my blog and highlight the URL at the top of the screen
    right click
    left click copy

    go back to yours and paste this in Link URL at the bottom of the box.

    leave size blank, because I made the image 160 x 160 so it should fit.
    Image alignment, you should make Center.

    Then click SAVE.

    da da, is done.

    Here are instructions for the post.
    On your blog, click new post.
    above where you would type you see all those icons.
    next to upload/insert is a square. click on that.
    This opens a box. At the top of the box in the middle is From URL.
    Click on that.
    Get the location URL from the properties box and paste it at Image URL
    Get the URL from the top of my blog and past it at Link Image To
    I guess you have to type in a title. use Beautiful Blogger.
    Click insert into post.

    Now type what ever you want.
    Copy and paste the rules of the award.
    List your seven secrets about yourself. Be sure they are revealing and embarrassing.
    List the blogs you want to pass the award on to. Do any number you want. Jane did 15. I cut it down to seven then added one for 8. Linda did 9.
    After you listed them, you want to link their blog names to their sites.

    To do this you are going to have to have the URLs for all the sites.
    Either copy it down or have the blog open and copy and paste it.
    First, highlight the name. Then click on the chain link icon.
    This will give you a little box.
    Type or paste the URL in the space.
    For target, I would set it to open in new window.
    leave title blank and I would not bother with class either.
    Then click Insert and move on to the next.

    Lastly, to link the three Items you have below Sign Me Up.

    Open their site in a new tab.

    In your blog, go to your Dashboard.
    Click on Appearance
    Click on Widgets.
    Scroll down to the Image widget.
    Drag it over and up to the sidebar.
    go to the button on The Breast cancer site.
    right click and left click on properties.
    hightlight the location
    right click
    and left click on copy
    go to your blog and past it in Image Url.
    go to The Breast cancer site and highlight their URL
    right click, left click on copy
    in your blog, paste in the bottom space.
    for the other two, go to their sites and copy the code below their buttons
    paste it in the text widget.

    Any questions, ask.
    I’m very happy to help.

    Just don’t tell anyone that I emailed to no-reply. lol

  3. gregjohn says:

    for the last three, you can go to my wordpress blog and click on them to get to their sites.
    I put them there for practice.
    My Fingers Are Poised

  4. suzicate says:

    HAHAHAHA…I am snorting my coffee. You let her have it, both barrels!

  5. Oh Peg, I have that outfit and thought I’d wear it for Easter. Now I’m not so sure! (Of course, my bunny slippers have the 3″ heels on them.) Do you think that would make a difference?

    • pegbur7 says:

      Oh, Linda, Linda, Linda…. I def would save it for Easter! Although you might get mistaken for one of those peeps (ya know the little yellow marshmallow chickees?). And the 3″ heels would so COMPLETE the ensemble. Her’s were flats with fur so the flats just didn’t do much for me! LOL

  6. gregjohn says:

    Peg, just ask if you have any questions. I got Linda through it. She did it beautifully.

  7. LisaF says:

    Stacy and Clinton (What Not To Wear) would love to get their hands on her! Kinda makes you wonder about other areas of her life as well, huh?

  8. suzicate says:

    Sista Love, there will be an award waiting for you at my place in the am!

  9. Angelia Sims says:

    You know a nice orthopedic doctor gave me a ARM CAST in that same color!

    Yeah, I would have caught your eye too. LOL!

    I soooooooooo wish you read Janet Evanovich novels with Lula in them, that was totally her.

  10. Gropius says:

    She could SO get away with that in Florida. We see that sort of fashion nightmare all the time…in public places. Saw you over on Water Witches Daughter–your sis?

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