I have a friend that I have known since high school. He is very funny and he makes me laugh. I will call him Joe. Joe works for a governmental agency near Washington, D.C. Because it is a governmental agency they must have security clearances, badges, etc. to enter the building. If they have their security badge they can enter the building from any entrance by scanning their badge. He and his co-workers as a routine park at the back of the building and enter from that entrance. Without their badge, things are a little more complicated.
This particular morning Joe had called me to “catch up” as we had not talked for a while. We were chatting about our families, our kids, etc. when he pulled into his parking lot and walked up to the door.
Me: What’s wrong?
Joe: I think I forgot my badge. I remember setting it beside me on the sofa at home when I was putting my shoes on.
Me: What does that mean? Are you gonna have to drive all the way back home and get it? (He lives like an hour from his work).
Joe: No, but I AM gonna have to go back out to my truck, get my wallet and ID and walk ALL the way around the building and go to security so they can give me a temporary one day pass.
Me: Sorry. Well, have fun, have a great day and it was good talking to you. We’ll talk again soon.
I didn’t realize how soon. About 30 minutes later my phone rings. It’s Joe.
Joe: I really shouldn’t admit this to ANYBODY but since I was talking to you… you’re not gonna believe what I did.
Me: Ummmm, you didn’t have your ID in your wallet or your wallet wasn’t in your truck?
Joe: No, I had my wallet and ID. BUT…I got to the security office and apologized in advance and told them I forgot my badge and needed a temporary badge. The security officer asked me what badge I was talking about and I told him my security badge to get in the building. The security officer said: You mean the badge that’s hanging around your neck?
Me: You’re right… you shouldn’t have admitted that to anybody. Especially me, because you KNOW I’m gonna tell SOMEBODY.
Like the other day, my husband is leaving for work and it’s pouring cats and dogs. He puts his stuff on the middle seat (we have a min-van with a sliding middle door on both sides) behind him. I kiss him goodbye and run back inside and close the garage door. He leaves. He calls about 15 minutes later and goes (where have I heard this before) “You’re not gonna believe what I just did!”
Me: What did you do honey?
Hubby: Well, you know how it’s raining so hard? Well, I drove all the way to the front of the subdivision and couldn’t figure out why the rain was SO loud. When I got to the stop sign I happened to look over my shoulder and the door was open. I had forgotten to shut the door. I’m surprised my stuff was still in there! (then very sheepishly he says) Hey, you better not blog about this.
Me: (through stifled laughter) Then you better not tell me when you do something stupid!
Speaking of stupid… since I’m telling on everyone else. I may as well fess up to my own flaws. I went into work about a month ago and there was a note on my desk that said “The printer is out of ink. Please go and pick some up when you go to the bank.”
As usual I am doing about 10 things at once, I take the empty cartridge out to write down the jet number, but get sidetracked. I set it on my desk while I answer the phone, then go get a cup of coffee. I come back, write down the number on a post it note, stick it in my purse, put the ink jet back and go about my morning.
I go by to get the ink jet and pull out my piece of paper to check the number so I can get it. There is a whole end section with nothing but this brand of ink jet cartridges. I’m looking for #106. I start down the line I see like 97, 98, 104 and then it skips to 110… I look a few over and back…. No #106. I start looking behind other cartridges in case someone misplaced them. No #106. I start at the beginning again and go ALL the way down the line looking at EVERY cartridge in the entire section . . . NO # 106! This printer is only a few months old! There is no way they stopped making them. So I start looking at the model numbers for the printer JUST IN CASE…. Maybe there is another cartridge that will fit that printer? I start at the beginning and start checking the model numbers on the sides of the packages. Finally after almost 30 minutes looking at the freaking packages I find the correct model number on the side of another cartridge box. SCORE!!! Good thing. I’m almost at the end of the cartridges. I buy THREE so I don’t have to go through this again anytime soon and head back to work.
I get to work and take out the printer cartridge to replace it. I set it on the desk. And open the new package. I set it on the desk beside the other one…. WTF??? I look at the old one and then I look at the new one and it suddenly dawns on my just how stupid I AM! The new cartridge is #901. Get it? I was holding the empty cartridge upside down when I wrote down the number to begin with! So there…. Now I’ve told on myself too.
Have you done something lately that’s so stupid you just HAVE to tell someone else? What was it? It’s confession time. 😉